The Top 10 Reasons to Have Kids {David Letterman-style}

david letterman top 10 reasons to have kids humor blog post

The Top Ten Reasons to Have Kids:

David Letterman-Style

#10. You never have to worry about not having toilet paper in a public restroom again…just send your kid over to the next stall to get you some!

#9.  You have a permanent built-in excuse for whenever you’re running late.

#8.  You can ride Dumbo and the spinning teacups at Disney World as many times as you want without getting any strange looks.

#7.  You can do things like paint with your fingers and play in the rain without anyone questioning your sanity.

#6.  You get to watch cartoons and all the classic Disney movies again…and again…and again…

#5.  You can read books written on an elementary reading level, and your kids think you’re really smart…at least while they’re little!

#4.  You can listen to silly music and dance without embarrassment.

#3.  Your listening comprehension will reach genius levels — you will be able to hear the yells, cries, whines, and screams of your children, even from the far corners of the house and know instantly which category they fit in: run-at-break-neck-speed-to-make-sure-everyone-is-still-alive, merely attention-seeking, or altogether faking.

#2.  You may be able to quit your job to stay at home and play all day.  That *is* what stay-at-home parents do, right??? 😉

…..Drumroll please!!!  

And the #1 reason to have kids…..

#1.  You finally have an “acceptable” reason to explain why you can’t keep your house clean!

Heart with text smiley face LOL
I hope you enjoyed this post as much as I enjoyed writing it.  Of course, all of this is written in jest and the goal was to bring a smile to your face.  I love my kiddos more than anything..but with that said, there is definitely some truth to this top 10!! 🙂
Want more laughs?
Be sure to check out my other “David Letterman-style” post: 
The Top 10 reasons to think twice before having kids David Letterman style humor funny laugh out loud preschool kids

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